Fall From Trust's Tower

Butterfly bestowed

Upon a Shining Scarab

A lovely gift

A deserved gift

A gift I wanted for my own

Jealousy

Deplorable and useless

Brings a stormy dream in which

Butterfly and Shining Scarab

Laugh at me behind my back

With great difficulty

I turn away from the delusion

Spoiled leftovers of the distant past

I come to understand

The issue is only with myself

And I think Now, I can confess

But before that

Shining Scarab
Loved and gentle one

Happened upon my anger

From envy’s nightmare

My wounded child screamed,
Why does Butterfly choose you?

Does she love you more?
Does she see something in you that is lacking in me?
Does she only pretend when she tells me I’m worthy?

I claimed disappointment while knowing I was disappointment

Trust

Hope’s companion

Without it, I existed safely inside my barren cage

So familiar

So empty

I ventured to hold it's extended hand

And let it carry me high

How far I fell

Still, I held hope

That at least Butterfly was spared

But Scarab
Shining Scarab

You told Butterfly all about

My fury

My ugly envy

And my claimed disappointment

And Butterfly, in turn,

unleashed on me

Her own angry child

A torrent of projections

And unrelenting preconceptions

Sending me

Spiraling

Into the abyss once more