************************************Denial covers the pain of the past * A blanket over the world * Lift a corner * Don't be afraid * Your life awaits you*************************************

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Thoughts on Life, the Universe and Everything

No, I do not think the answer is actually 42. (If you don't get the reference, don't worry about it.)

Recently, I had an awesome discussion with one of my favorite spiritual gurus. She said:
The Spiritual Core Self - the breath of life, the light of beingness, the core of goodness - is the essence of us all.
We all have it.
This material life experience has us fall asleep to that, and we all then struggle to wake up out of the distortions, the untruths about ourselves. The innocence and freshness of small children remind us of who we really are. They aren't “asleep” to who they really are. They are in the moment, in joy.

As we heal we get more and more glimpses, moments, then extended periods of knowing our true essence. In my view, this returning is essential to the planet.
This is something I have thought about on my own, but her words sparked a fresh flow of ideas and concepts that brought a new depth to my understanding of what feels true to me.

What feels true to me about existence:: 
• There is a kind of Universal Awareness.
• In general, babies and young children do seem to have more connection to that Awareness than young adults.
• Many people seem to long for a connection to something bigger, to themselves, and to the universe.
• As they enter the stage of life that is not about procreation, many people seem to find a new level of connectedness.
What feels true in my life:
• I think I was born "awake."
• I’have a longing to feel connected to something and a yearning to find myself.
• It feels important to return to that Universal Awareness.
• It was necessary to "fall asleep".
I  assume there is a  reason  this world exists. Therefore, it is important that I invest myself in it, entirely.There is some greater purpose to this form of existence or why would "God" - in whatever form you picture God - put us here and put us through the trials of life?

If I was always aware of my connection to the universe, I would never fully invest in this life. If I always saw this world as an illusory conduit to something greater, "I" – as I am in this body - would become meaningless. Would I bother to form attachments, procreate, raise children or do anything else which seems to be only of this world? Or would I Instead spend all my time in that spiritual world - and ignore the one here?

So - "falling asleep" to who I really am seems important and inevitable.

I accept that what I do here is important and also transitory.
Many people will say things like "forever" when they are talking about relationships, but I don't see that I will continue as an individual with the same attachments to other individuals when I leave this life. I can't reconcile that idea - of retaining this individual identity - with the concept of rejoining the "all" or the "one" (which is the same thing). If the individual identity is really an illusion then so much of the "work" we do seems unimportant. Why does it matter if we are happy in this life? Why does it matter what the relationships we have are like? Why does the planet exist at all?

I accept that everyone - or every aspect of The One - has a purpose. Each life is significant and adds an important part to the cosmic soup of Allness or Oneness. I don’t believe that there is “one true path” or that people who do not follow specific teachings or a specific set of rules will be punished or cease to exist. Instead, I believe that we are all the same entity and when we hurt each other, we hurt ourselves. When we cause harm to others that pain is carried over into the cosmic collective and we all (which means the ONE BEING we are) suffer for it.

It's as if this physical world is a hologram, a story we tell ourselves, a shared dream. To me, it’s like we are one and the same... not just "the same under the skin" but the same exact single thing.

So imagine that You and I are part of something much bigger. When we return to that, we will not need to be individuals any longer. What we are will be added to the mix, and everything in the mix will be added to "us" and we will cease to exist as we are but will continue to exist as part of something else, something greater, something eternal.

The one.
The all.
The Universal Awareness.
The infinite God.

We feel alone, in these bodies. There is a constant struggle to connect with others to fill that void.
There is a struggle to find a connection to God and the infinite.

The last important part of my new revelations is this:
In the past I worried because I felt that if we were all part of a universal entity, and there is only ONE being, then:
  • I am talking to myself here.
  • We are interacting with ourself on a grand scale.
  • This is all one big illusion of friendship and intimacy and connection when, in reality, we are all alone - the only one.
If we are really the only one, there is no connection to anything but "ourself" - and then there can be no end to the lonely feelings of life or the struggle to find "connection".

As I reconnected with this idea, I found a possible flaw in that logic. "Loneliness” is a human condition. It is just part of the illusion.

Loneliness would not have existed before because if “we” were aware of a connection to everything all the time - if we were part of the cosmic ALL - we would not "miss" anything.



  1. As usual, you give me much to think about. The line: "Loneliness is just an illusion," comes to mind. I feel like I've heard that in a song somewhere, though I can't place it.

    Your post also reminds me of the book "Chronic City," by Jonathan Lethem, which I just finished. You might enjoy it.

    Anyway, I always get something interesting from your posts. Thanks for sharing.

  2. Provocative thoughts...I imagine we all will find out the answers one day. Perhaps we will awaken from the deep sleep we call life. For now, it's all illusive... to me.

    Thanks for sharing!

  3. The Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy I presume.

    I can not live it sometimes I feel like I am in this world and not of it. Sometimes I feel like I am a spiritual being having a human experience not a human that has spiritual experiences.

    I am not say you are or do. Some who say we all are part of something bigger leave out those that do evil and just consider them misguided. That is to me an easy way out.

    I feel and it is a belief that there is no evil only lack of good. I truly believe that being good even simple things like smiling and being pleasant make a positive difference if it is genuine. Genuine being from the heart and not expedient.

  4. Imagine we are all a collective one, and each of our deeds, feelings, emotions, spirit, etc (including nature), were all melded together into a collective mass( a big living mound - globbed together, so to speak) - I imagine this is what God might be - forever changing, forever evolving, forever creating. All we do and think is contributed to the greater collective being, which, is also us. So if I steal from you, I'm stealing from myself too. And, If I love you, I'm contributing to the greater mass, and of by virtue that I'm a part of it, I'm loving my self too. Sames goes with anything contributed or taken away from the big ball.

    Blessings my friend.

  5. what a great post, shen~ thank you so much for sharing your spiritual views. i don't personally believe there is necessarily a purpose or reason for any of this. we might just be here for no reason. not that i'm saying i'm right here, that's just my feeling. but in my case, that doesn't bother me. i find the notion that this all might be random to be inspiring actually. and it makes me want to make the most out of this while i'm here. because there can be such beauty in this life. such joy.

    i found myself in complete alignment with what you said here:

    Each life is significant and adds an important part to the cosmic soup of Allness or Oneness. I don’t believe that there is “one true path” or that people who do not follow specific teachings or a specific set of rules will be punished or cease to exist. Instead, I believe that we are all the same entity and when we hurt each other, we hurt ourselves. When we cause harm to others that pain is carried over into the cosmic collective and we all (which means the ONE BEING we are) suffer for it.

    - yes indeed! i do feel we are all connected, because what we do affects those around us and then there's the ripple effect. so it's so important how we think and feel and live our lives, because we are all strings of the same blanket, so to speak. and i love the term "cosmic soup" :)

    your views of an afterlife, and of all of us one being literally are fascinating to me. i wonder if that's how things are. it's beautiful :)

    i guess since i don't believe in an afterlife, that is another reason i'm wholeheartedly invested in this life i'm aware of and the relationships i build here. i feel that drive to connect with others. i feel like it's part of what is meaningful and wonderful in life, when we can connect with people and feel that much less alone and that much more understood and empowered and strengthened along the way. it is so wonderful to experience mutual friendship.

    that said, there's a lot to be said about the solitude of the human condition. in my life, i have feared silence and isolation and loneliness that is here in this existence. but the less i'm afraid of it and the more i have allowed myself to enjoy my own company, and cultivate self-love, and discover what can be found in peace and silence and solitude, the more quality i've found in my life. less fear, less panic, less insincere communication, more genuine connection. because when we fear silence and isolation, sometimes we fill that void with things that aren't good for us, people that aren't good for us. instead it's good when we're comfortable on our own, because then the people we connect to are people we're more likely connecting to for healthy reasons.

    safe hugs to you, shen. thank you for writing about this. so wonderful~~

  6. oh yeah, and i thought 42 was from the hitchhiker's guide also. i loved that book :)

  7. Shen, I firmly believe we are born "awake" (or I would say "aware"). And, when abuse happens are children, we are forced to "fall asleep". Healing, for me, means learning to be awake again, which because so many years of being asleep has gone by, that awareness is hard to deal with.

    I also think abuse isn't the only cause of being "asleep" I think many go through life asleep. I think many don't challenge that and they live their whole lives asleep. For some, they may not even realize it.

    For us, you and me, and the people reading your blog, this is not the case...

    This is why I am so optimistic for everyone out there who writes about their experiences... They've already taken a huge step.


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