************************************Denial covers the pain of the past * A blanket over the world * Lift a corner * Don't be afraid * Your life awaits you*************************************

Monday, January 10, 2011

Underneath it All

I have been falling for a while, and this desparation is intense. I'm working hard, pushing forward, searching for the way out.

Today, I did the following drawings as I try to understand what I really am, what this little piece of the world I live in, really is.

I give the outside world and the past so much power, but in reality they have no power unless I give it to them....


In a garland you see flowers, but you don’t see the thread. These emotions are like the flowers of a garland. Sometimes anger flowers, sometimes sadness flowers, sometimes happiness, sometimes pain, sometimes anguish. These are the flowers, and your whole life is the garland. There must be a thread; otherwise you would have fallen apart long ago. You continue as an entity – so what is the thread, the polestar? What is permanent in you?

      From Emotional Wellness
      by Osho

Do you see me?

What you view with your eyes is exactly what you expect to see, but it isn't me.

Right now, I’m so covered with emotions, I can’t even find myself. These things which grow on me appear to belong, but they are only reactions to the past, for every moment before this is the past.

Can you see how thoroughly they cover me?

They look as if they belong... they look right, because this is what you expect to see.
If you close your eyes, can you imagine what is underneath?

What would you see if you stripped away this weighty covering?

What am I? 
On what does this anger, this anxiety, this formidable grief grow?

Breathe…. Breathe… and look beyond what is really only a reflection of the outside world.

Petal by petal, remove despair as if it were a dirty garment. Tear it off... Cast it aside...

I am light.
I am color.
I am weightless and formless, so there is no need to cover anything.
There is no modesty,
no guilt,
no embarrassment.


I am not what the world made me. 
I am exactly what I'm meant to be.... and nothing can change that.


  1. This is beautiful Shen, thanks.

  2. Shen, this is truly wonderful. It takes a lot of courage to look at what's beneath the surface. Good for you! I hope, eventually, what you did hear will help you.

  3. Wow, Shen! This is powerful! Thank you for sharing it. I love the progression.

    For what it's worth, I think what is underneath is beautiful! I hope you do, too.

  4. Thank you, Onesurvivor
    for stopping in and for your very sweet comment.

  5. This is a really wonderful post, its a really great metaphor for examining ourselves and I love your series of art.

    "Petal by petal, remove despair as if it were a dirty garment. Tear it off... Cast it aside..."
    This is such a beautiful sentiment. I think it can be really hard to see our true selves through all the emotions and hurt.

    I want to repeat what OneSurvivor says because I think she said it so well:
    I think what is underneath is beautiful! I hope you do, too.

  6. This is beautiful, Shen. As othes have said, so are you :)


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Co Creation

Co Creation
We create the life we live

Love your inner child...

...for she holds the key...

...to your personal power.
A lesson is woven into each day.
Together they make up the tapestries of our lives.